A dolphin’s butchered corpse was found on a New Jersey seaside final week, so, naturally, the web is now exploding with jokes about flop presidential candidate and MAGA convert Robert F. Kennedy Jr. being the offender.
In case you recall, Kennedy’s dismal political marketing campaign was mainly only a long string of scandals, with a number of involving useless and mutilated animals. First he was accused of eating a dog. Then he admitted that in 2014 he’d dumped a bear cub carcass in Central Park. At one level, he bragged about having a freezer full of roadkill in his home. Then, in August, he was federally investigated after it got here to mild that he’d cut a whale’s head off with a chainsaw. Understandably, the current look of a useless, mangled animal has the web turning an accusatory eye to the Kennedy scion.
The Marine Mammal Stranding Middle, a Jersey-based non-profit devoted to the rescue, rehabilitation, and launch of distressed native marine mammals and turtles, mentioned in a press release Friday {that a} dolphin’s “butchered” physique had been found on a seaside in Allenhurst, New Jersey.
“The animal’s flesh had been fully eliminated with clear cuts from a pointy instrument, leaving solely the top, dorsal fin and flukes,” an announcement reads. “The animal’s organs, aside from the guts and lungs, had been eliminated.”
The night time earlier than the animal was found, a stay dolphin was noticed within the surf not far-off, MMSC mentioned, whereas noting that it’s unclear whether or not this was the identical animal. The Nationwide Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration Workplace of Legislation Enforcement is now investigating the dying, the MMSC mentioned.
These questioning in regards to the Jack-the-Ripper-type maniac who stole the aquatic mammal’s innards wasted no time in pointing the finger (if solely jokingly) at RFK. Sure, the tweets thus far have been good: “Aw shit I didn’t understand RFK got here to city,” said one smart-ass on X. One other particular person, who additionally shared the story on the platform, mentioned: “I’m guessing RFK Fr. sorted an alibi already.” Yet one more poster quipped that Trump had formally “misplaced the dolphin vote.”
There is a non-zero probability that this was RFK doing a dolphin sacrifice forward of the election pic.twitter.com/qL1roCqzMp
— Fifty Shades of Whey (@davenewworld_2) November 5, 2024
To our information, Kennedy had nothing to do with the dolphin’s dying, although it might be nice if he issued an alibi for Friday night time so we all know for positive.
General, the MAGA-verse doesn’t have an ideal monitor report in relation to animal welfare. Certain, for the previous week, rightwing influencers have been expressing outrage over the euthanization of a New York squirrel, however the main purpose for his or her anger appears to be authorities overreach, not a woodland creature’s well-being. No, for probably the most half, Trump’s allies appear to be hounded by unusual allegations involving animals.
Living proof: Kevin Roberts, the president of the Heritage Basis (and, thus, one of many key proponents of the dystopian Project 2025) was accused of bragging about killing a dog with a shovel (Roberts has denied this). In an upcoming e book, Roberts additionally apparently complained that the existence of dog parks was an instance of the creep of “antifamily tradition.” JD Vance, Trump’s working mate, has additionally been accused (largely jokingly) of liking dolphin porn.
After all, there’s extra at stake for the animal kingdom this election than canine parks and dolphin porn. Trump, whose first administration was not identified for being notably environmentally pleasant, has allies who’ve advocated for the gutting of the Endangered Species Act. In addition they wish to open up long-protected nationwide parks for mining and federal lands for urban development. It’s unlikely that the pure world will profit a lot if he will get into workplace once more.
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